Awesomely Modest

Posted by Jae on June 27th, 2003

JoAnn had taken my car, because moms car had flat and missing tires. I was out in the driveway when mom and dad came home in dads car. There was a 256-colour digital bat in the yard which my parents wanted dead. I yelled ath them and told them not to shoot it. Then, just as mom was about to let up, 4 more bats started showing up in a straight line doing the same things as the original, these new ones were much more pixelized. Mom said to shoot them, and some guy did. They all stopped moving, and I got pissed at mom. Then a real bat flew down the street and perched on a branch over our driveway. Mom wanted the guy to shoot it, too, but I got pissed again. I thought it was strange that just as I was thinking “Bats are beautiful creatures” mom actually said it. I got my camera out and zoomed in on it speading its wings open, and got a weird picture of it taking off. It was flying at me, and I took a picture and got it’s face. It kept coming after me and I backed up all the way to the front door. It swooped at me, then landed on the ground and came after me. I kicked it away fairly hard, and it came at me again and I kicked it again. The picture on myc amera looked like an angry gorilla face coming at me.

Posted by Jae on June 25th, 2003

I was with Jessica at some college it seemed. I told her I was going to go for a quick shower, and ended up spending hours before I got into the shower. I was walking to the shower area with a bear character costume on, saying hello to kids, and when I got near the shower I started acting weird. It turned into a third person thing where I was the Terminator, and started driving in circles in parknig lots, and doing thrange things on the way to the shower.People caught on and thought I was going to kill them, which when they tried to capture me I did. I then took a shower while people watched me to make sure I didn’t try anything.

Then there was something about photography, and something about weird containers in the living room, but I don’t remember.

Posted by Jae on June 25th, 2003

I was waiting for tym for somenting, and thought he was here and went outside. He wasn’t here yet, but someone peter knew was being stupid and annoying, planning to peel out of our driveway in a minivan while beating the inside and windows with a crowbar. Peter tried to throw something at him, but his friends held him back. I ran after the guy while he peeled out of thedriveway and jumped up onto the driverside window aprea that hea had smashed, holding on to the van as he tried speeding up to knock me off. I jumped off right as he reached the end of the street, and he went up the driveway across the street and looked outside wondering how I stayed on. Then the van flipped over and he messed his dace up. Somehow, after that, he was on the street with a scateboard, and I kicked it and called him a stupid motherfucker.

Posted by Jae on June 23rd, 2003

I was supposed to kill a nurse in a hospital. I was waiting in a lounge, waiting for the room to clear out a bit. Only the nurse, and two men were in there. When the elevator came up and opened, I walked on and turned around, one of the men followed me, turned around and shot the man behind the nurse as I shot the nurse. Atleast, that’s what was supposed to happen. I kept doing a sortof Groundhog Day thing with repeating the hit over as various small elements changed.

Posted by Jae on June 18th, 2003

It started off with Tym wanting my help becouse he had dnoe something really bad, I think burned something. He wanted me over his house for some reason. Then JoAnn called me and said she needed me to go to arizona with her and her father for a counseling meeting for reasons she hadn’t told me. Dad wanted me to come with him somewhere for some reason too. I was trying to call Tym and joAnn on the phone, but the numbers on the phone werre all out of order, and it as really confusing me to dial. I told my father this when he started asking what was taking so long, and it turned out that he changed the buttons around. I hit the flash button at one point and heard mom on the line talking to Tyms mom, both sounding rather upset. I gave up on calling Tym, and tried calling Jo, it took me awhile to realizI needed to cal her fathers cellphone, and then I had a dard time findiwng his number.

I then was pulling into my driveway in the snow, and there was a green cobra (the car) there (mind you I have no clue what this looks like), I knew it was Justins, and started saying shit outloud about how I didn’t want a car like this, or anyone associated with it at myhouse. Something along the lines of how I got rid of various things, and how once when there was a Yak that didn’t want me around, I ran. Then all of a sudden there appeared a moose which I kept calling a yak, and it was chasing me around the yard. I couldn’t get inside the front door fast enough, so I made it chase me over the cobra, and then I ran arounrd back to grab the porch railing and pull myself up so I could get inside. Jo & Justin were inside on the couch, and I ran straight for the vaccuum cleaner and brandished it like a sword/baseball bat, waiting for the yak to break through the glass door. It did, and I missed it with my first swing. The second one got it, and it fell into a box. I opended the box and noticed the carpet was covered in blood, and started dragging the thing outside onto the deck. Someone else followed me onto the deck and I told them to throw the thing in the woods for me. When he brought it down, it woke up and then Matrxy things started happening, only with lag. People were all over the place doing various martial arts, trying to hit the yak, but missing, and it was hitting them back. I ran inside with the vaccuum, and used it like a golf club when the thing came inside.

Posted by Jae on June 18th, 2003

This is also from the 12th. I was in some big boxy thing with my old boss, playing with mounted mortar looking things, and firing them off for fun. My social problems professor showed up and told us to fire them around in a safer place. We went outside with the mortars and strapped them into large coats and ran around firing.

Posted by Jae on June 18th, 2003

This is from the night of th 12th, I think. I wrote it down since I was at Jessicas. I went to some barn looking house with peter and casey on a gokart made from a radio flier. As we were trying to leave I noticed my camera was missing. I knew who took it though, and went next door to ask Powdered Toast Man for help. He was sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee and watching tv. I told him what happened and he said to sneak into the bathroom window of who took it. I did, and got my camera back, and Powdered Toast Man flew up to the window to fight the guy off as he chased me.

Then, ready to go, the key to the kart was missing. We went and took it from a bitchy neighbor girl, and I started the kart and took off the parking brake. We started rolling, and I couldn’t find the brake pedal. We rolled down a hill and into a muddy pond. When I stopped freaking out, I realized that we had skimmed across the pond, and onto the hill on the other side. Pete and I carried the kart to the top and unbent the front so that we could fit in it again. The brake pedal was missing, and the shoelace it pulled was torn.

I made sure casey was alright, and that Pete had her ready. Once we got moving, it started raining and streets got pretty muddy. Cars & trucks were going under and flipping quite a bit, so we steered towards a huge construction site of mud and climbed that. We then walked down bricks after passing the muddy streets.

Posted by Jae on June 12th, 2003

I was at some dinner thing and started reading the message board from my Visual Communications class last semester. I was with Jess and Jo, and Tim and Katie from my class were there, though I didn’t speak to them, and I was waiting for my grandmother and aunt. Jess and Jo went out to pick up food for us since we were starved and tired of waiting. While they were gone, I searched for my name on the message board and got weirded out when people were asking if I was dating someone- until I realized I typed my name as ‘joi’, and they were asking about a joil dating someone. Then Jess came back with vegetable fried rice and I hugged her before waking up.

Posted by Jae on June 7th, 2003

I was is my room, on my bed typing. My keyboard started smoking, and I took it apart to try to figure out what the problem was. When I couldn’t find one, I went upstairs, where I heard someone discussing how the way she rewired my computer should have killed me somehow. I peeked in and saw that it was some woman staying at my house and Cherie, and beacme very confused. I went over to the bathroom and set next to the wall with peter, eating peanutbutter and chocolate heart candies that we had. Dad came down and took a look at the computer with me, we found nothing wrong. I went upstairs and started questioning people about what the fuck was going on, and nobody seemed to say anything. I said something mean to cherie, and started walking away while hearing dave tell her that he’s starting to believe she’s up to something too. I saw the other woman in my parent’s room, talking on a cellphone to someone about what she’s been doing, and I ran in and punched her in the stomach, and she kicked me off. I grabbed her foot and tried to break her ankle by twisting and she fell on the floor telling me how she’s doing all of this in order to give women an equal say in government or somethnig. She was yelling really fast, and I was more concerned about breaking her ankle or leg. Mom came in when she heard the yelling, and told me that the woman wanted mom to shoot up a school, and then I felt the ankle give, and woke up to dad geting ready for a clown gig.

Posted by Jae on June 6th, 2003

I was at a friends house who doesn’t exist, and was gettnig ready to go to a concert with him. His brother, and Tym were not coming. I went to my room at my house to get dressed, and my mom started rushing me and bugging me that I was moving too slowly. I eventually started yelling at her because she was rushing me out the door for school, which I wasn’t going to.