Jenny and my first dive together!

2012.06.23, 09:46 – Dive #7

Breakwater, Monterey, CA

  • Buddy: Jenny!
  • Computer: Oceanic Veo 2.0 (wrist mount)
  • Weight: 29Lbs (too much)
  • Water Temperature: 54°F
  • Beginning Pressure Group: n/a
  • Max Depth: 25′ (Profile)
  • Bottom Time: 0:33
  • Ending Pressure Group: F
  • Bottom Time to Date: 3:33

Guided tour from Seven Seas Scuba instructor, Preston.  He was awesome and helped carry Jenny’s Scuba unit down to the beach and into the water to keep her knee happy.  Once she was all geared up we swam out a bit and tried descending.  Jenny had to come up to the surface quick just to calm her nerves and breathe through her reg for a minute, and then we went down again.  Visibility wasn’t that impressive at first but got better as we swam away from other groups.  Tons of starfish and a few decorator crabs, one of which I noticed while we were looking at a HUGE sun starfish for a bit, and realized that kelp was walking away from us.  Jenny put a sea cucumber in Preston’s hands for some reason, and I saw a bird swimming around at the bottom.

Jenny’s knee started feeling a bit sore towards the end of the dive, so rather than risk really hurting it we packed up, called it a day, and went out for a sushi lunch.

Drysuit certification!

2012.06.16, 09:14 – Drysuit Dive #1

Breakwater (pipe), Monterey, CA

  • Buddy: Instructor
  • Computer: Oceanic Veo 2.0 (wrist mount)
  • Weight: 28Lbs
  • Water Temperature: 53.1°F
  • Beginning Pressure Group: n/a
  • Max Depth: 44′ (Profile)
  • Bottom Time: 0:29
  • Ending Pressure Group: I
  • Bottom Time to Date: 2:24

Started off rocky with my original buddy, who couldn’t descend properly for a host of reasons I’m sure he feels like he can explain rationally.  Eventually Instructor grew frustrated enough to have me go to the bottom and do fin pivots and hovering, and we went back to shore.  The 15 minutes it took before we went back to shore I’m not quite counting in all my diving crap, though I merged the profiles together.

Then Instructor and I went back out, I took my BCD off and put it back on quick, and we went for a tour along the pipe by ourselves.  Saw a crapton of starfish and sun starfish, a decorator crab, and I think a shrimp.  Visibility cleared up once we got away from the anchor and I discovered I started getting cold at almost exactly 30′ in my drysuit.

2012.06.16, 12:25 – Drysuit Dive #2

Breakwater, Monterey, CA

  • Surface Interval: 1:33
  • Weight: 26Lbs
  • Water Temperature: 50°F
  • Beginning Pressure Group: B
  • Max Depth: 43′ (Profile)
  • Bottom Time: 0:36
  • Ending Pressure Group: P
  • Bottom Time to Date: 3:00

Original buddy decided he could do this dive, took him forever to get his skills all dealt with while I both waited on the surface and by the anchor underwater.  Visibility was much worse at the beginning of this tour, and Instructor making it clear to buddy up with her.  We saw a couple giant crab, along with every starfish ever.  I checked my depth when I started feeling cold and was at 29′.  On our way back Original buddy started becoming too buoyant and rising over us.  We eventually surfaced when he couldn’t get it under control, and then decided to head back down for the swim back to shore.  Instructor gave me a bearing to follow since we had no anchor and visibility had become shit again, in case we got separated.

Got separated we did!  Apparently my aluminum tank made it hard for me to get back under once half-empty.  They descended without a problem and I sat struggling at the top until I forced my way under the water and then kicked myself deeper until I could control things again.  I followed the bearing at a slightly faster than casual pace, not wanting to have them possibly waiting on me at shore.  It was fun riding the surge with a single little frog kick and I eventually found myself in a school of probably a couple hundred really tiny fish.  They swam off about as soon as I noticed them.

I swam to about 5′ before surfacing and then stood and watched for them while riding the swell.  Turned out that they realized the aluminum was probably throwing me off, and went to surface, but by that time I had already forced myself under and gone on my merry way.

And now I’m certified to use a drysuit, which is perfect because Jenny and I have our first dive together scheduled for next week!

Confirmation: I am the best person any Customer Service representative will ever deal with.

For the first time ever, I got started on holiday presents early this year-  well, with Jenny’s presents at least.

“Now I’m gonna bend over, and when I do…

A friend of mine had pointed out a good while back that he found a drawing tablet on Monoprice that had excellent reviews, and pissed all over Wacom and their ass-raping prices.  Seeing as I’ve lost track of how many nights I’ve gone to bed at 1 in the morning, with Jenny still trying to crank out her next page of Zombie Killers, I’ve kept this tablet in the back of my mind, waiting for the perfect time to give her a gift.

Continue reading “Confirmation: I am the best person any Customer Service representative will ever deal with.”

I’m diving!

Pictured: Me.

About 4 years ago, Justin and I said to each other in perfect unison, “Hey cunt, wanna learn to scuba dive?”  “Yes.”

I then almost immediately moved out to California, leaving Justin to get certified on his own a few months later.  Jenny’s into scuba diving as well.  She’s been certified since she was 13, and had her father as a diving buddy.  With my inheriting Ray’s gear, and Justin coming out next September for a wedding, it seemed like the perfect time for me to get off my ass and into the ocean.

Continue reading “I’m diving!”

I am totally an adult.

My gmail account has had some bizarre mixups in the past in that I’ll get emails from places in Australia responding to someone with the same/similar email address as I have, except with a period separating their first and last name.  I’ve always found it entertaining and it doesn’t happen enough that I consider it a nuisance.  Recently I’ve been getting a different kind of bizarre email, though.  From the initial email and the pdf attached to it, I’ve surmised that the gentleman is a University of Arkansas student and a big fan of god.  His emails have been updates on his trip to Haiti to work in a Mission over the summer.

I’ve finally grown tired of his updates, and decided to figure out what was going on.

Ludwig van Jaethoven <> Fri, Jul 9, 2010 at 11:38 AM
To: Jonathan Redacted <>

Who in sam fuck are you, where did your godloving ass get my address and why do you keep sending me shit?


Your Mom

I chose the polite route.  He decided, however, to be a prick.

Jonathan Redacted <> Fri, Jul 9, 2010 at 12:03 PM
To: Ludwig van Jaethoven <>

You should grow up and probably after the first one sent me an email
asking that. And i would have told you that i have had my ex
girlfriends address wrong. But have a blessed day and i’ll keep you in
my prayers.

Seriously?  You’re going to act all high and prayer…y?  I’ve got something for you to pray for!

Ludwig van Jaethoven <> Fri, Jul 9, 2010 at 12:28 PM
To: Jonathan Redacted <>

Pray for penis.

Penis penis penis penis.



That ought to clear everything up.